Vacant Eyes
by bffimagine
Summary: Sort of a poem fic if that makes any sense. I wrote the poem by the way It's harder to get back a fire that was lost and relight it then just feed the one that is already burning... RanKen


Bffimagine: Sort of a poem-fic, if you can put it that way. By the way, the stabbing part isn't from the Epitaph mission, but it was sorta inspired by it. In the Epitaph mission, the target is insanely fast and could've gotten away if Ken hadn't held onto him as Ran stabbed him, but the blade went through Ken after it stabbed through the target; it was unavoidable, and Ken inevitably lost a kidney from it as far as I know. If I'm wrong, feel free to review and let me know.

Vacant Eyes

Vacant eyes dead and cold Ending the lives of young and old 

_The simple cry of complete sorrow_

_Seals the fate of its tomorrow_

_Nothing the in Eyes of Ice_

_Murderer from deadly Weiss_

_Blue-green eyes of apathy_

_Show no signs of sympathy_

_But soon the ice melts to bland_

_Nothing left but the thought of bloodied hands_

_He stares at his trembling fingers_

_Murderous horror in his mind still lingers_

_Then the tears begin to fall_

_Ice melted at the simple call_

_Apathy gone replaced with compassion_

_The blood drips in horrific fashion_

_He wishes not to believe it_

_Yet the thought comes though he doesn't conceive it_

_And remorse is all that remains_

_In a mind so tarnished with bloodstains_

_Eyes only ice during assigned mission_

_Become filled with Ken's pain, no longer Siberian_

_Cold death replaced with hurt and innocence_

_Emotions flowing with smooth eloquence_

_The eyes become vacant and dead_

_But Ken looks up and hopes for a better future ahead._

Ran sighed heavily as he finished bandaging Ken's unconscious form, the limp, bleeding body damaged to a terrible extent.

'Why did you do this to yourself, Ken? Why did you make me do it to you? Why are you so selfless?'

Long ivory fingers swept silky soft chocolate bangs off of Ken's sweet sleeping face.

Soon Ken's face was twisted in pain, and Ran inhaled sharply.

"Ken, love, it'll be alright."

A small, agonized whimper slipped by Ken's lips.

The flames licked mockingly at Ken's naked skin, searing away the flesh and leaving charred, bloody bone in its wake. Soon the fire suffused Ken's entire body, enveloping him in its smoldering heat. He could smell the putrid scent of burning blood, and the pain was near unbearable.

"Ran… please… help me…"

Tears slid down his cheeks only to sizzle away in the flames, and then all Ken could see was black…

"Schuldich! Wake him up! Please!" Ran bit back tears, and although they only shone in his eyes he knew they tinged his voice.

The German sighed. Ever since Schwarz had joined Weiss it had been utterly insane. Injuries the white hunters sustained were unthinkable, and it was incredibly hard to get them enough medical attention. Crawford, obviously, foresaw most things and it did help a bare amount, but even so, he couldn't foresee all the details. Which led to the fact that Crawford foresaw the target where he was, and they had been able to track him down easily enough. But what he didn't see, was the hatch in the ceiling where highly trained guards came raining out of at the target's whim and call.

Leading, thus, to Sibe—Ken's capture and severe torture.

And then Crawford saw Ken's badly injured body held like a shield by the target, his cowardly attempt to get away once all his guards were killed. He foresaw that Ken wouldn't tell them anything, and also how Ken told Ran to go ahead and run him through with the katana in order to stab and take out the target. Yet Crawford didn't actually expect Ken to really do it.

He also didn't foresee the intense look of suffering in Ran's eyes as the katana went through Ken's body.

Schwarz and Weiss alike both watched in horror as Ken lost consciousness when the blade impaled him through the abdomen. They saw the look of twisted incredulity on the target's face, seeing how Ken was willing to get run through by a sword and possibly die to ensure the success of the mission and the lives of his companions. Such camaraderie was so rare in the world…

They saw the tears that fell from Ran's deep violet eyes as he caught Ken in his arms, kissing him on the forehead softly and crying his apologies over and over.

Katana met floor with a clank as it was dropped from Ran's limp grasp. Ken's blood and the target's dripped from the blade.

That night the target died, but so did a part of Ran.

"Ran really loves Ken, ne, Brad?" Schuldich murmured softly to the American, bumping into him after leaving the aforementioned assassins in their room, having pulled Ken out of a very nasty nightmare and into the world of the wakened.

"Hai. I really wish it wasn't him who had to stab Ken like that." Crawford sighed and ran a hand through his dark blue tresses of hair, as always impeccably styled.

"I don't think I could've done that to Yohji." Schuldich mused aloud.

"Neither could I to anyone else."

"He's awake, by the way."

"Who?"

"Sibe—Ken."

"Ah, Schu. Old habits die hard?"

"Hai. I'm so used to Siberian, Abyssinian, Bombay and Balinese, that Ken, Ran, Omi and Yohji seem almost alien to me. Or… well, not Yohji." A sheepish grin flitted across Schuldich's lips.

"Now that he's awake, I think Ran will be relieved. You should go pass the message along to the others, especially Aya."

"Ja. Later, Brad."

Schuldich bounded up the stairs of the Koneko no Sumu Ie, knocking on all the doors. Ran and Ken shared an apartment, Omi and Nagi, Brad, Farfarello (now known affectionately as 'Farfie'), and Aya had their own rooms, and he and Yohji shared a room as well. He quietly told them all that Ken was awake, and avoided the clawed and bladed assassins' room careful to keep his voice down.

Momoe-sama was very glad to hear that Ken was well, though she did find it odd that Schuldich was the one to inform her.

Omi, Nagi and Yohji weren't in their rooms, but when Schuldich walked into the store he found them hard at work—even Yohji.

"Ken is awake," he stated softly.

Yohji's eyes visibly lit up and Omi looked as if he were about to cry in joy. Nagi looked simply overwhelmed with happiness, since when Schwarz first joined, Ken was the first person to accept the other team and treated them like brothers.

"Kenken's finally awake!" Yohji cried, grabbing Schuldich and hugging him tightly.

"I was so worried… he was out for a week…" Omi sniffled slightly and smiled.

"It took a hell of a lot of working to pull him out of that nightmare," Schuldich muttered, his voice muffled by Yohji's shoulder.

"Had Ken died… I don't know what I'd do…" Nagi slumped into a chair.

Meanwhile some chattering girls came into the shop and the four killers set to work right away.

Strangely enough, the only person who up and ran to Ran and Ken's room as soon as he heard word of Ken's awakened state was Farfarello.

He knocked and when the soft reply came, he opened the door gently. He'd mellowed out a bit after leaving Esset and joining Weiss and such. Occasionally he still had to be put in his straightjacket and sometimes he came into the shop smelling of blood, but those times were only about once a week now.

"Ran… Ken… I'm glad you're alright."

"Farfarello… thank you." Ken's voice was hoarse and soft, but it still held the bright innocence and cheerfulness as always.

He coughed and covered his mouth with his hand, blood streaming from between his fingers.

"I should leave now," Farfarello stated quietly.

"Thank you, for coming. Don't worry about me." Ken gave his teammate a smile, his lips deep red with blood.

"Oh, and Farfarello, I brought some hibiscus up for you to put in your room, since you liked the hibiscus flower." Ran motioned to a vase of artfully arranged hibiscus flowers on the bedside table.

"Arigato," Farfarello whispered gratefully, taking the flowers and leaving.

Cleaning Ken's hands and mouth, Ran stroked Ken's cheek soothingly.

"It looks like there's some internal damage. We can't do anything about it though." Ran gently held Ken's hand, running his palms over Ken's long, slender fingers.

"Ran, don't feel bad about the mission."

"I can't help it. I stabbed you right through with a sword."

"Well, if it helps any, I told you to."

"That's part of it. What if I hurt you one day, and you told me to kill you? Would I listen like I did this time? Would I kill you? I don't want to think about it, but it's there. I know you'd never do what I did. You'd find some way out of it. But I did as you told me. What happens when I do what you tell me and you don't survive to tell the tale? Promise me, Ken, that you'll never ask me to hurt you in any way ever again."

"Gomen nasai, Ran. I can't promise that." Ken's eyes were downcast as he remained holding onto Ran's hands.

"But, I promise, no matter what, we'll die together. Be it on a mission or a whim of suicide, we die together."

"Then I promise we die together. I'll follow you even in death."

"Arigato. Aishiteru, Ran."

"Aishiteru, Ken."

Ran pressed a soft kiss to the top of Ken's head.

Smiling slightly, Ken drifted off in a pain-induced slumber.

"I'm leaving Weiss." Ran's eyes were set and cold, as they used to be, before Ken had managed to fully melt the ice, before Aya broke down his barriers, before his brothers in Weiss chipped away the walls.

"Ran…" Ken's eyes were tear-filled and the hurt was visible in his aqua eyes.

"If you follow me, I'll kill you." Ran turned his back and walked away, not another word uttered from his frozen lips.

"Aishiteru, Ran." Ken's head dropped. Suddenly, a sharp stinging pain came to his cheek.

"Don't say you love me, I don't love you. I'm leaving because of you. I never want to see you again." Ran spat, twining his long fingers around Ken's slender neck, lifting the younger boy off the ground, choking him.

The suffocating eighteen-year-old had tears streaming down his face.

"D-Dakedo," he stuttered, "Doshite…?"

Ran slapped him again, then dropped him unceremoniously to the ground.

Ken curled into a stinging ball of pain as he saw Ran's back disappear in the darkness.

"I beg you, please, Ran," Ken was crying, the trails of salty tears evident on his cheeks.

"No, Ken. I-I can't kill you," Ran shook his head, his ear-tails like trails of blood and his tears liquid diamonds.

"Ran." The expression of utmost pain was written across Ken's features with frightening sharpness, it made Ran's heart break just seeing it.

Trembling, Ran drew his sword. His face was reflected on it, the wet trails of tears across the sides of his face.

"I'm sorry, Ken," he whispered, then made a quick, clean slice across Ken's middle. Not a cry escaped the young assassin as he fell to the ground lifelessly.

Ran gathered Ken into his arms and cried. Sobs wracked his body as he placed tender kisses in Ken's silky soft chocolate hair that smelled of sunshine, grass, soccer, summer and Ken.

"I'm sorry. Gomen nasai, koishii."

The katana stabbed through Ran's body as well, and after a quick, sharp pang of pain, everything was black.

Ran didn't know why he woke up exactly. He thought for a moment it was because he was covered in cold sweat and shaking ever so slightly. But he soon realized it was because Ken was whimpering softly in his sleep.

The other assassin was covered in cold sweat as well, and the sheets were drenched in his blood.

First Ran was about to panic. He regained his composure and took a deep breath, then carefully shook Ken's shoulders.

"Koibito, wake up. Ken, it's just a nightmare. Ken! Wake up! I'm here, Ken, wake up!"

Very slowly, Ken opened his eyes, his vision blurred by a haze of pain.

"R-Ran? You're here… Please don't go…"

"Ken?"

"Don't leave…"

"I'm here Ken. I won't leave you. I promised, remember?"

"You left… I asked you why… you left…"

"It was a dream, love, don't worry. It was just a dream."

Ran touched Ken's forehead gently, and recoiled as he touched the burning skin.

"Ken, you have a fever. Try to relax." Ran moved to go toward the bathroom, but Ken let out a strangled cry.

"Don't leave!" he cried, his voice quiet and tired, hoarse because his throat was dry and painfully tight. He could taste coppery metallic blood in his mouth from the effort.

"I'll be right back, Ken, don't worry. I just need water and bandages…"

"Please, Ran, don't go…"

"Ken…"

"I love you…"

"Ken… I love you too. You know that."

"You said… you said you didn't love me… you said you never wanted to see me again."

Ran froze.

"Ken?"

He pulled Ken's face so the aqua tear-filled gaze met his own soft, warm violet one.

"I will never say I didn't love you. I will never say I didn't want to see you again. I swear."

Ken's eyes showed understanding, but his flushed face paled almost instantly, and he lost consciousness immediately.

Ran rushed into the bathroom and filled the bowl they kept in the medicine cabinet for just this purpose with water as cold as the tap could get it. He grabbed a clean washcloth and the well-stocked first aid kit and ran back into the bedroom.

Setting to work quickly, Ran bit his lip and the bloody patch on the sheets steadily grew in diameter and circumference.

Dipping the washcloth in the water, he wiped Ken's face gently, then carefully pulled off his blood-soaked pyjamas. Throwing the clothing to the ground to be dealt with later, Ran very meticulously stripped the bandages that covered Ken almost completely, starting with his legs. There was only one gash that was bleeding profusely on the right leg, but there were three that needed mending on the left.

Moving up, Ran unraveled the gauze over Ken's arms, applying antiseptic to the lacerations that were up the whole lengths from his wrists to his shoulders.

Then Ran gently rolled Ken over to do his back, which was particularly serious. The deepest wounds had been stitched, but the neat stitching split completely, and some of the welts had become swollen and inflamed, most likely infected and making Ken sick. So Ran applied liberal amounts of antiseptic to Ken's back after just barely staunching the bleeding.

As gently as possible, Ran flipped Ken onto his back, careful of his wounds.

Peeling off the bandages on Ken's stomach and chest, Ran winced as he noticed that here, too, the stitches had split.

Just as he did with Ken's back, Ran pulled out the bits of thread and applied antiseptic to all the cuts. A sharp pain shot through his heart as he treated the stab wound, which went straight through Ken's abdomen. Ran had made sure not to hit Ken's spine, but it had completely impaled the former soccer player anyhow, and in order to kill the target, Ran had to twist the blade once it plunged through the flesh, making the wound rather messy as opposed to a clean cut.

"I'm sorry, Ken."

Bandaging Ken as quickly as possible, Ran silently thanked the gods that Ken hadn't broken any bones or damaged any organs. His wounds were bad enough, and he didn't think Ken would've survived had there been any damage to his bones or organs.

He was barely surviving now.

Ran remembered that Ken's insides were bruised, but he knew by looking at the external bruises that it wasn't too serious. It was severe, yes; but not quite fatal.

"You can make it through. Don't give up on me." Ran brushed his fingers against Ken's smooth cheek, wishing he could take away all the pain.

A soft knock came from the door. Yohji poked his head in, soon followed by Omi and Nagi.

"Ken-kun?" Omi hesitantly approached the bed, taking in the bloody sheets and clothes and bandages strewn about the floor.

"Is he okay?" Nagi reached out with his mind and picked up all the bloody material, filling the bathtub with water and sending them into it to soak out most of the blood.

"He'll make it. Kenken always makes it."

"Yotan…" Omi gave Yohji a warning look.

"I'm hoping he makes it through this time," Ran sighed and combed his fingers through his strawberry-red hair.

"Omi-chu…"

"Yohji-kun…"

"Omittichi…"

"Yohji."

"Chibi…"

Omi lunged for Yohji and grabbed him by the ear, dragging him out of the room. Nagi smiled lightly and followed them out, turning back to close the door.

"Don't worry yourself, Ran," he muttered, "You'll get yourself sick."

The door clicked shut.

"I… see they've been… amusing themselves." Ken chuckled weakly.

"Ken?" Ran whipped around.

"Listen to Nagi, koi, he's right. Don't worry, I'll make it." Ken leaned back against the mattress, grimacing slightly in pain but otherwise keeping a neutral look on his face.

"If you die, I couldn't live with myself."

"Shh, Ran, I know. I couldn't live without you, even if I tried."

Ran sighed in resignation and slipped beside Ken in the bed, tenderly cuddling the shorter boy to him, holding him as tightly and as close as he could manage without aggravating Ken's injuries.

"What happened in your nightmare?" Ran asked softly, his enquiry open to be answered or not.

Ken's eyes seemed to glaze over with ice.

"Y-You left me. You said you were… you were leaving Weiss. Then you turned to walk away, and I told you I loved you. Then, you slapped me and told me not to say I loved you because you… didn't… love me. And you said you never loved me. You said you never wanted to see me again." A solitary tear slid down Ken's cheek at the memory.

Ran wiped the tear away.

"I won't ever say that to you. That would be more painful than having to kill you."

"Please Ran, never leave me like in that dream."

"Nightmares are only nightmares. That will never happen."

Brad Crawford wiped his eyes as he left the flowers at the conjoined graves. He left a simple token, a twined rose and gentian, placing it upon the snow. Stepping back, he admired the two flowers, then looked up to look at the headstone.

It was a simple stone of black marble, and in the center in large, gothic letters, spelled 'Weiss: White hunters of the night'. Then in slightly smaller letters on either side of the stone read 'Fujimiya Ran' and 'Hidaka Ken'. The rest was written in small, crimson lettering, as if it had been cut into the stone and the stone itself was bleeding.

_'Hidaka Ken, brother to all of us. He will be greatly missed. Lover of Fujimiya Ran. In the end, they died together. Rest well, onii-chan.'_

'Fujimiya Ran, brother of Fujimiya Aya and lover of Hidaka Ken. They died together, and hopefully will rest together as well. Farewell, leader.'

Yohji stepped forward with tears in his emerald eyes, and he placed a simple soccer ball candle by Ken's side yet didn't light it, knowing Ken liked fire but still feared it to an extent. He placed a white cross on both graves, and Ran's picture album on Ran's side.

Omi stepped forward as Yohji stepped back, and placed Ran's katana into the unbreakable, irremovable glass box in front of the headstone. Afterwards, he placed Ken's bugnuks in as well, sniffling and wiping away his tears as he allowed Schuldich to move forward.

Even the German had tears sparkling in his brilliant blue eyes, the mischief gone for the time being. He lit incense and stuck the sticks in the ground to spell out 'Guten Nacht'.

Nagi gently moved a beautiful sakura blossom to rest on top of the glass case, silent respect radiating off of him.

Farfarello moved forward, brushing his fingers against the smooth black stone. He took out his knife and carved in between Ran and Ken's names, cutting very carefully. When he moved away, a delicate heart was engraved into the marble.

Crawford cleared his throat gently. Yohji and Omi looked up, their cheeks wet with tears.

"They're together, in a better place now. Because of a mission, Ran was forced to leave Weiss, and ultimately, it tore Ken apart. He never fully recovered from his injuries, and at that moment, he pleaded Ran to end his misery with his katana. Ran… couldn't do it, and at that time, Schreiend chose to attack, and though they fought side-by-side, neither came out of the battle alive." Crawford's voice cracked at the end, and he coughed down his tears. Who knew that once two of the Kittens died he'd feel so… empty?

Omi took Farfarello's knife, and underneath the last words on the tombstone, he carved in small, neat letters, 'Goodbye, Abyssinian and Siberian.'

Vacant eyes now closed always Yet the fire that was continues to blaze 

_To melt the ice and burn the walls_

_To warm the soul and answer the calls_

_Before the eyes were pained and dead_

_Haunted with blood and filled with dread_

_But now that they're closed they have a peace_

_Serenity of mind and the nightmares ceased_

_Now gone into eternal rest_

_Perhaps death was for the best_

_No more pain, hurt or fears_

_No more sadness, anguish or tears_

_Finally innocence is free to fly_

_The memories left behind to die_

_So with the flame the fire burns on_

_Found as if it was never gone_

bffimagine: That's so sad… Well I would've gone into detail and all, but I don't know. I sorta like the 'mysterious' openings where the readers can draw inferences and conclusions as to how everything happened. But… ah well. Tell me what you think!

(P.S. I sorta didn't want to follow the Gluhen version of this so I just tweaked it a bit…)


End file.
